“How are you?”

The subsequent reaction to this inquiry tends to be a habitual, “Good, and you?” Our response is a prescripted reflex. Rarely do we acknowledge the simple yet profound depth of this question.

“How are you?”

It’s casual small talk while at the checkout line, shouted from the mouth of a busy student while rushing off to class, asked by an old friend while catching up over a cup of coffee, tenderly inquired by a nurse while caring for a patient in the hospital bed, whispered to a loved one while soaking in the silence of deep grief.

“How are you?”

This question can either provide a space for exciting giddy life updates or unlock the floodgates for earthshattering news. We rarely ever ask it of ourselves and often don’t listen when anyone asks us.

“How are you?”

Conversation is life-giving, yet small talk is played like a game of tennis. It’s a sport of back and forth, back and forth, and ends with no clear winner. We’ve all been asked this question at some point. These three words are thrown around as customary and even anticipated dialogue. However, the real answer hidden behind this question is often deeper than most of us are willing to say or listen to in a passing conversation.

“How are you?”

These three words reveal a deeply personal question that is often a filler for small talk. Instead, this should be a question that allows us to empathize with one another. To grieve, to celebrate, to speak, and to listen. We are commanded to bear each other’s burdens yet how often do we unravel plastered smiles and expose our hearts on our sleeves? What would the world look like if we asked more simple, yet intentional questions? How would we be different if we listened when we asked and were honest when we answered?

So, “how are you?”