Abigail Sefzik

▲ Published as an op-ed for Mar’s Hill Newspaper.

Is it just me, or did trust issues become sexy? Distrust is a relatable quality that we all seem to have in common. “Oh, you have trust issues too? Ha ha, that’s so fun for us!” We have become masters of faking it while simultaneously distrusting one another. It is a toxic, systemic, and seemingly perpetual cycle. We fake nice, we fake love, we fake laugh, we fake smile, we fake sad, we fake happy until, eventually, we fake ourselves. 

But what is causing this?

There is a sphere of growing societal distrust in the Church. Religion is becoming nothing more than a cute “morning coffee with Jesus <3” Instagram aesthetic. The Church, too, has clothed itself in the garb of consumerism, and just like other products, it will not sell if it is not sexy, flashy, or entertaining. Corporate church culture drives religion in the West––capitalism determines which churches make the cut. Traditional Biblical exegesis parallels the Church to the Bride of Christ. Unfortunately, the behavior of the modern church more closely resembles an unfaithful whore than a woman in white. 

Elders speak on the sanctity of life as they secretly schedule their daughter’s abortion appointment.

Pastors celebrate the Virgin Mary as they excommunicate pregnant teens in their congregation.

The Church speaks out against violence as they cover up the buried bodies of hundreds of Indigenous children.

Priests practice the sacraments while they commit grievous sexual scandals behind closed doors.

Christians spew rhetoric of love and acceptance as they cut off ties with their gay friends.

Widely respected spiritual leaders preach about righteousness and faithfulness as they sleep with someone else’s wife.  

All of this is cause for a deep-seated distrust of the Christian religion. I recognize that these instances do not represent the church as a whole, however, it is cases like this that contribute to our trust issues. The Edelman Trust Barometer reported in 2017 a steady and observable decline in trust across 28 countries. Their research included increasing distrust in a variety of institutions including business, religious, media, political, and NGOs. This study along with the Pew Research Center, and the Gallup World Poll all produced the same conclusion: we do not trust each other. We do not trust the government, police, doctors, businesses, churches, media, food labels… all the bases are covered.    

Trust issues are an epidemic: it is no surprise that this generation is steadily trending towards deconstruction. I do not claim to be a relationship guru, however, I do know that an essential component of a healthy, functioning relationship is trust. It is no wonder that we feel as though we cannot communicate our doubts and griefs to the Church. I often ponder whether or not God still recognizes His Bride.

Our honest heartbreaking inquiries are met with shallow Pinterest-worthy bulls—. Our broken trust haunts us, but we shut up and sit still because our reputation is more important than our doubts. There is more focus on the “right” answer instead of the real answer. 

Our inflated view of leadership within our community glorifies imperfect individuals, and as a result, leaves no space for honesty. 

Doubt can be deadly, not because of the doubt itself, but rather because of our fear to address it. Distrust should spark critical thinking and intellectual inquiry. Instead, our distrust has produced a sense of cultural apathy. Building back trust requires intentionality, time, and taking responsibility—is the Church ready for that? Trust issues are comfortable, after all, but what if the truth is uglier than our dilapidated constructed sense of reality? Our response should be a critical analysis of our internal convictions and external behavior. 

A traditional essay has a neat conclusion, but as I wrestled through this topic it occurred to me that I could not write one: I do not have a beautifully worded answer, but merely an acknowledgment that the status quo should cause not only discomfort but also an action to do better. 

Instead of offering empty apologies from the church pews, the Church should stand and begin to walk.